So, it’s that time of week again: time to do your chores; your laundry. Not to worry though; laundry is easy, especially when factoring in the reliability of your dorm’s four laundry machines that are meant to service hundreds of residents. It’s almost therapeutic, as if you’re washing away your sins of the past week or month or however long you’ve put off doing this very simple task. We’re not judging.
Throw those yucky clothes into the wash, set your timer for 36 minutes, and 45 minutes later that hefty load of yours is ready to dry! You pull tangled jeans and underwear (definitely still saturated with bodily fluids) out of the washer, but something is missing.
It’s stuck in between the door and the barrel. Really stuck. And sopping wet.
You give that sucker a big ol’ tug, hoping it’ll come sliding out nice and easy. Nothing. You pull again, and again, and still it’s not budging! There are two choices here: continue pulling on that darn sock until it comes out or accept defeat. But maybe you wore that pizza-patterned sock throughout high school and it reminds you of a simpler time, or it was a birthday gift from that one slightly toxic ex of yours that you never really got over, or you just need to salvage it since the rest of your socks have holes in them. Either way defeat is not an option.
No! Someone is putting your half-clean clothes on top of the washer to make room for their dirty load. Before you can say anything, they set the machine to its most aggressive cycle and leave. You know that sock is being sucked into the endless void that is the interior of the washing machine and will remain stuck there for all of eternity. Retrieving that sock was never an option, peace was never an option.