April 19, 2019

10 Ways You Might Know the Guy That Just Smiled at You Across the Arts Quad

1) IDK, maybe your peer advisor. You have one, right? You used to, at least. Do they expire?

2) It’s that guy in your discussion section. The one that always brings his questions back to the vaguely related class he took last semester.

3) Annex. O-week. That can’t be him, can it? Oh god, stop thinking about it. Can you shut the brain down?

4) Chill. It’s just the dining hall guy. He’s nice. He always gives you extra slices of flank steak.

5) That’s Pete, your lab partner. You wave hi. Wait, shit, is that Pete? Pete wears glasses, right?

6) Shoot, no it’s Xander. He was your freshman year suitmate! How could you forget that?

7) Ok, focus. No backpack. Is holding a large plastic Cornell Store bag. With two old people. This is a prefrosh! Of course he’s smiling. That’s got to be it… or was Cornell Days last week?

8) You’re almost 100 percent sure that’s your highschool boyfriend coming back to make a public declaration of his love. You knew it, he’s not over what happened. No wait, your pretty sure he had brown hair, and this guy has black hair. Totally different. Crisis averted.

9) Could it be some random person who you didn’t know just making eye contact and smiling to be polite? Of course not, people don’t do that.

10) Suddenly, it hits you. It’s Brian. Whew, Brian’s the best. You probably should’ve smiled back at him instead of freaking out and racking your brain to come up with unlikely and outlandish possibilities.

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