November 26, 2016

Easy Target: The New Hampshire Goalie’s Father Just Got Laid Off

Good news, Lynah Faithful! At this Saturday’s hockey game at Madison Square Garden, it will be an easy time to come up with ways to taunt University of New Hampshire goalie Jeff McCray because, as of last monday morning, his father was just laid off from the automobile manufacturing job he held since 1987!

Can you say “Sieve!”?

It won’t be hard for Cornell fans to come up with jeers such as “You’re fired, McCray!” and “Struggling to pay the bills?!”. After hearing “Hey Jeff, your father’s employer just called and he said,” students will get to yell at the top of their lungs: “nothing because your dad is unemployed!” with as much energy as the Chinese economy, boosted from outsourcing of American jobs. Don’t let me down!

Cornellians were certainly given quite a scare yesterday when McCray announced he was considering dropping out of college to return home and earn money to support his struggling family. Luckily, because he’s decided to stay on the UNH hockey team and follow his dad’s advice to “never stop pursuing his dreams,” fans will be free to yell at him until he breaks down in tears!

For those who want to support McCray’s family, his parents are currently collecting donations to stop the bank from foreclosing their home.

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