April 2017
7 Ways To Get A Chemical Engineer To Fall In Love With You
1. Skip the cologne, just dab some Benzene on before leaving the house. Any ChemE will notice your aromaticity immediately! 2. Drop subtle references to your experience operating a distillation column. The efficient separation of products from a multicomponent feed is considered a HUGE turn on. 3. Take them outside The unending hours cooped up…
Check Out These Classes You Can Only Pre-Enroll For On The Dark Web
Fall 2017 class roster too peachy for you? Check out these classes that offer a more realist educational experience to better prepare you for the crummy world out there. GOVT 1830: Intro to Sex Scandal Relations AEM 1200: Using Cocaine to Optimize Day-Trading RUSSA 1340: Mail-Order Brides MUSIC 1390: Encoding Satanic Messages in Your Records…
Gross! This Roommate Forgot to Throw Out His Decomposing Goat Carcass Before Break
We’ve all heard awful roommate stories before, but none as bad as this. After Spring Break, Dylan Murphy ‘19 returned to his Becker Hall dorm only to discover, to his dismay, that his roommate Chad Stapleton ‘19 accidentally left a bloody goat carcass from their vernal equinox pagan sacrifice out in the open for THE…