May 9, 2017

Anabel’s Groceries to Satisfy Your Food and Personal Insecurities

Photo by: Cameron Pollack / The Cornell Daily Sun

Conveniently located in Anabel Taylor Hall, Anabel’s Grocery is now open seven days a week, providing access to healthy, affordable food! Stop by to fill your basket with remedies to these common insecurities.

Low Self Esteem
Chug a marked-down can of Rockstar! It’ll leave you feeling invincible and consumer-savvy.

Commitment Issues
Have a handful of Chex Party Mix. We know, it’s a lot. Take your sweet time.

Fear of Public Speaking
Get this bag of gluten-free, dairy-free, nut-free, soy-free, non-GMO, organic ancient grains bread, pre-sliced. Carry it wherever you go—we guarantee it’s a conversation starter.

Ivy League Inferiority Complex
Try some off-brand Lucky Charms to remind you that even though you’re not first choice, you’re a solid safety!

Natalie Always Complains About Having A Flat Butt, But Like, Her Butt Is Bigger Than Mine
Enjoy an onion, knowing that what matters most is on the inside.

Social Anxiety
Take comfort in knowing that those canned sardines will always be on the shelf for you.

You Still Don’t Have An Internship
Well none of these groceries can help you there, but Anabel’s is hiring for next semester so be sure to apply!

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