Tag Archives: comedy

Heartwarming: When This Student In a Wheelchair Felt Left Out, These Brothers Helped Him Do a Keg Stand!

Adapting to College life can be tough for everyone, but imagine how hard it is for those of us facing physical disabilities. All of the social anxieties felt by being thrown into a new setting with dozens of people you’ve never met before get heightened by the palpable impairment that Read More

Game Changer: Bus Stop Bagels Achieves Perfect Bagel to Bus Stop Ratio

Cornell Dining continues to tower above the rest, as evidenced by their most recent feat. Bus Stop Bagels, located in Kennedy Hall, has done what no other eatery has managed to do: achieve the most exquisite bagel to bus stop ratio. Good job, Bus Stop Bagels! That’s quite a schmear!  Read More

Celebrate Black History Month at Cornell with Your Favorite Black Friends

It’s February, so that means it’s time to celebrate Black History Month! We all know about Martin Luther King Jr. and Harriet Tubman, so let’s take this opportunity to reflect on all of the meaningful connections you have made with your black friends, emphasis on the “s!”  What a good Read More

Heartwarming: Ithaca Will Accept 50 Syrian Refugees and Steve from Cortland

Sometimes, a community comes together to make the world a better place. And that’s exactly what our inspiring little City on the Hill did when it was recently approved to accept 50 refugees, and also this guy Steve Schweitzer from Cortland. Beautiful! “We hope that we’ve made a positive impact Read More

Cecily Strong Didn’t Bring Any Friends To Her Show, So We Drew Some In For Her

Last week, CUPB brought comedian and SNL cast member Cecily Strong for a show titled “Cecily Strong & Friends.” The only problem? She didn’t bring any of her friends! We thought that was too bad, so we drew some friends in for her. Don’t worry, Cecily, we’ve got your back! Read More

This Ithaca Barber Gave Me a Circumcision When I Asked for “a Bit Off the Top,” But He Did a Pretty Good Job

Ithaca barbers aren’t well known for their quality. I don’t know a single person who’s gotten a decent haircut anywhere close to campus. And I’m no exception, because when I asked a barber in Collegetown to take a bit off the top, he circumcised me. Now, normally, I would complain, Read More

We Asked Students Which is Worse: Keystone, PBR, or Being Waterboarded?

Cornell students are all used to pretty awful drinks, and everybody has tried the college basics by now. So we went around campus asking students which they thought was worse: Keystone Light, Pabst Blue Ribbon, or the ancient torture technique of waterboarding? Here’s what we found. Jordan Burnmauer ’17: Wha… Read More