April 24, 2018

Crisis Averted! Almighty Student Assembly Obliterates ILR-HumEc Merger with Sternly-Worded Resolution

Alice Song / Sun Staff Photographer

Dropping the cold hammer of institutional justice, the Student Assembly smote the unpopular ILR-Human Ecology merger this past week by passing an entirely symbolic Resolution. Whoopee!

via GIPHY

The all-powerful protectors of the student body convened Wednesday and, with the ruthless efficiency we’ve come to expect from the SA, struck down the insidious proposal in one swift and brutal death blow. Student Government win!

The harshly disapproving resolution not only wiped away the fears felt by many that the administration is unresponsive to students, but it also quelled the doubts any might have had about whether the SA was anything other than a mighty shield against the forces seeking to undermine the university.

At press time, students in all colleges were resting easy knowing that the long arm of the SA would protect them whenever evil should rear its ugly head.

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