January 31, 2018

21 FWS Names I’m Ashamed To Have On My Transcript

1) FWS: Let’s Play — I got a C- in Yahtzee.

2) FWS: Modern Romance: Dating and Relationships Among Young Adults — “Hot tip,” said my sixty-year-old professor, “say, ‘Hiya toots!’ by the jukebox, and y be doing the jitterbug in no time.”

3) FWS: Talk. Writing is for Pussies — Okay, fine, this one isn’t real.

4) FWS: Yogurt? — The jury’s still out.

5) FWS: Sluts and Hoes — Yep. Very ashamed of this one.

6) FWS: Pin The Tail On Stuart — Stuart had a really bad time.

7) FWS: Fuck — God dammit.

8) FWS: Feminism For Men — Surprisingly, the same as feminism for women, just with one picture of a monster truck.

9) FWS: Everyone Gets A B+ — I got a B.

10) FWS: Be Christian — On day 1, they took us to Sage Chapel and baptized us.

11) FWS: Ian? — WHERE IS HEEEE???

12) FWS: My Mom’s A Bitch — She made him eat grapes, and he doesn’t like grapes.

13) FWS: Meditation for Beginners, Just Breathing — *sigh*

14) FWS: I’ve Got the Almond Milk Blues — We were all lactose intolerant except for Gary, who’s just really sad about almond milk.

15) FWS: Want My Old Skateboard? — No.

16) FWS: Crabs, Sexy???? — No.

17) FWS: Canada Is Technically A Country — No.

18) FWS: Urethras In The 21st Century — They were all pretty urethra-y.

19) FWS: One Unbelievably Well-Woven Basket — The basket got an A+.

20) FWS: Geronimo! — For the first two weeks, we just jumped off of medium-sized ledges onto a gymnastics pad.

21) FWS: Jumanji For Dummies — We just watched Jumanji at half speed.

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